“Don’t care what other people think.”
Yeah, yeah, yeah… We’ve all heard that more than we heard 50 Cent in 2003. And it would be optimal to never care what others think… But we’re human. We’re social creatures. As hard we try not to, we all care what other people think sometimes and to some extent.
Of course we should all work towards minimizing how much we care about what others think of us (that’s true freedom, after all). But as in any human endeavor, there will always be that tiny space separating us from perfection. So what do we do with that space? We leverage it.
Caring about what other people think can be a good thing if used as motivation. It can be useful only if it becomes raw fuel to propel you towards achieving goals.
Caring what other people think can vary greatly depending on the circumstance. When you’re riding high, it’s easy to disregard how you’re perceived and trust your own judgement and intuition. But there’s also times in life when we’re left vulnerable, and desperately searching for external validation.
A classic example of this is after a breakup. It’s natural to feel a little (or very) insecure during such a time. After a breakup, people usually feel they have something to prove. The craving of external validation overshadows one’s self-trust. The feeling of “wanting to be wanted” comes to a head. But instead of eating pints of ice cream and crying yourself to sleep, this can be used as an opportunity. An opportunity to use caring what others think to create You 2.0. And improving your body can be the perfect catalyst for change (see above). Think about it. It’s completely within your control, and you get tangible results. Once you start seeing your work pay off, you believe that others perceive you differently (external validation). You gain confidence, creating a snowball effect in every aspect of life. You develop a success mentality. You become empowered (internal validation).
And this motivation doesn’t just apply to building a head-turning physique. It can (and should) be harnessed for any kind of self-improvement. Use that motivational fuel to accelerate your success in whatever you choose.
The motivation cultivated when searching for external validation then becomes a self-correcting mechanism. Once put to good use, you step back into the paradigm of trusting your own judgment and intuition (instead of relying on the opinion/validation of others). It reinstates balance.
You can’t live your life based on others expectations (that’s the #1 regret of the dying btw). But when you do find yourself seeking that external validation, leverage it as motivation. Become an improved version of yourself, and regain your sense of empowerment.
Do you,
-Stevie P!
